I’ve had some wonderful teachers in my life. some stood at the front of a classroom, some opened up a world to me through their own interest or habit, and some were just cautionary tales. Each of them impacted me and impact me still. Yet, the one I’ve had the most exposure to, I’ve listened to the least (my parenting hat is nodding along) and as I listen more and more, I recognize just how much wisdom was available to me all along that I so stubbornly ignored whilst I ran all over hell and back looking for answers. Finally learning to slow down is changing all that, and as i relax into it, I soak up more and more. And the best part is: it’s funny.
I’ve been learning a flower essence process over the last few months and things have begun to get somewhat intense. Of course, the more I relax the more I receive and the easier things become. Let me be clear: I am psyched about this process. I am enjoying it, and while it seemed awfully complicated at the beginning, i quite like it and I don’t really care how time consuming it can be. I don’t care one bit. As in, I just did a test it will probably take me months to complete and I am just grateful. Happy to do it. Glad to be in the process. The enormity of the task doesn’t intimidate me, or make me rue the start of it. I’m just grateful. In fact, the more I do it, the more gratitude I feel so the fact it may take months makes me curious about how much gratitude might be available to me at the end – not necessarily because of any specific result, but simply because i’ve opened up to gratitude more. anyway…
Much like the evolution of breathing while at red lights has become a whole driving deep breathing session with full body relaxation at the lights, i keep getting senses of “this could help” leading me to deeper levels of relaxation and better uses of my time. Usually with a joke. Which is usually “on me.” Lovingly, but pointedly. There is no question I have taken myself far too seriously. My body hasn’t been making the same mistake. Which is funny, because it seems it had to basically get very unfunny in order for me to lighten up.
I’m excited to learn what my body has to teach me, in general as well as through this flower essence process and any other processes or protocols I am drawn to through genuine interest, curiosity and excitement. My body as my teacher does not have me learning a set curriculum (and perhaps this is the paradigm shift that most eluded me) but a fluid and ever-changing dynamic that invites me to participate in life, in the moment, in new and refreshing ways. This is so much better than my “determined seeking” for solutions and “the right answer.” So much better. I hope I never go back, and that if I do, I shorten the time it takes me to remember this very gentle, loving, interesting and funny option that is always awaiting my attention to blossom.