youd think i’d know better, and i did even as i wrote yesterdays title, but i wanted to document a feeling.
I’ve noticed this for years. as soon as we comment on how well the children are getting along, they start fighting. As soon as I acknowledge any sort of awesomeness, it changes.
Change is the nature of things, that’s for sure, though we’re often looking for states to become somewhat permanent. I found this especially confusing when the kids were younger and I would finally get a schedule in place and have really just a day or two of “hey! this is working” and some randomizer would pop up and shift everything.
I often feel that i signed up for the constant change program. I am certainly more interested in change than most people I meet, and I guess as soon as we get some mastery is a fine time to move on to the next thing, but it is particularly unnerving when the universe does it for you.
I had a particularly good, somatic sense of lightness yesterday. Today is different. Each day, even each section of any given day, has many flavors and textures. Our subtler experience of any phenomena can only be accessed when we address the macro.
What’s exciting is that i don’t need to feel as good as i felt yesterday to be ok. i finally have some understanding that the changeability is a boon. That impermanence is my friend. That the value of my being is not dependent on the experience i am having.
Swami Vivekananda says you can think you are the cat’s meow, as long as you are certain everyone else is, too. I love that. And it’s been super fun to incorporate…it is not what i was used to. i think i was used to either inflating myself and disdaining others, or just as commonly belittling myself while mystified at others’ capability, or having figured out some magic formula. parts of the path, perhaps, but really an unpleasant worldview to be walking around with. damn. bad preposition at the end of a sentence. i do that all the time. dang.
We are in this together. All of us. Like it or not. There are natural stages of development, and we’re all going through them all, or at least an unimaginably complex individual web. So, let’s just accept:
all life is sacred
know it or not, we are divine beings.
(knowing is enormously supportive)
we are evolving.
we can tell because that is the natural state of all expressions of life, so it’s really not that big a surprise.
evolution moves towards greater love, freedom and relationship
life is unfolding
there is so much we cannot control, and so much we control completely
this produces the dance of expressing ourselves in response to life
we do our best work when we are feeling wholeness
we contact wholeness through the body and the breath
throw in some devotion to life itself
heaven on earth.
even on the confusing days.