life is funny

I haven’t written in a while, although I’ve been writing quite a bit. life is full of paradox.

what is most interesting to me today is that we are all such a hodgepodge of good intentions and questionable execution, yet often those with questionable intentions have good execution. Why do you suppose that might be?!

I posted my first course on Udemy. It’s called, “Slowing Down: What it Means, Why it’s Good, and How to Do It.” It’s about an hour and a half long, in 33 three-minute segments. It’s a start. It’s the very beginning, and it’s nice to have the beginning begun.

Where things go from here will be fascinating. I am happy to say that I feel as surrendered as I’ve ever felt, and every deep mindful breath helps me be even moreso. Surrendered to Life Itself as It moves through me. and is me. and looks at itself with these eyes.

That is some exciting shit. Hate to be profane, but there it is.

I am dedicated to evolving. it’s what gets my attention. right now i’m delighting in the idea that evolving is shifting the focus from the “self” as the collection of moments and memories where life is building the self over time, to the perspective of the oak tree within the acorn. The acorn breaks open and begins building the oak tree *out of thin air*

I used to think that the acorn used nutrients and built the stem that started up through the dirt, but that’s not the case at all.  The water and nutrients extracted from the soil make up only a tiny portion of that seedling. That seedling is expanding from within the seed and growing. Miraculously. just like the rest of us. I want to find a good link here. i wish i could remember where i first read/saw this.


I’m super excited because I feel whole. I feel like i have plumbed my depths and am willing to continue if the need arises. I’m not afraid of the fragments – fragments are an opportunity to integrate. I’m not trying to avoid anything or achieve anything. i’m breathing. smiling. breathing. listening to my body, moving according to the magical confluence of how I feel, what is needed, who is available and what’s in this moment. Bringing our best selves to the present moment.

this requires being in touch with our best selves. the part of us that has been learning from all of our mistakes and circumstances. The part that shows up on behalf of others we love when our advocacy can make a difference for them. That fullness of presence is an energy field and the more we visit it, the further we can expand into it and start bringing it off the meditation cushion and into the day. We can address this wisest part of ourselves every time we have a curiosity of judgement. It’s there. In us. Just waiting for us to ask.

Thomas Hubl was talking about our bodies our not as old as the time we’ve been on earth. our bodies are hundreds of thousands of years old. Your body has so much programming you cannot even begin to understand. There is so much going on and unfolding naturally that our conscious brains rarely can acknowledge it lest we believe life is totally outside of our control.

Life is definitely outside of our control. But it is the foundation of our creativity. Big difference. Important distinction, but I am out of time. Hope to explore this more.


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