too many choices.
I am sick to death of self-improvement modalities. I am sick to death of wonder foods, healing protocols and transformational retreats. Only because I am sick of chasing them. I am sick of trying to improve myself, to get to the next level, to supercharge my anything. I am sick of marketing materials in almost every form, but especially the ones allowing me insider specials today only. I am sick of supposedly spiritual people using the same tactics as beer commercials and fashion magazines to make me feel I’m not quite right but might be after I take their course. I am sick of sales pages that ramble on forever, but at the bottom I’m still 3 clicks away from learning the actual price. I’m deathly sick of “before you complete your order, here’s a one-time opportunity for <me to upsell you>.” I’m sick of the sales funnels and the private facebook groups and the webinars. I’m sick of all of it.
In fact, I’m just sick. And I literally like my illness more than I like any of the things I’ve listed above. My illness has more to teach me. It may be physically painful but it’s not psychologically manipulative. It has my interests at heart (not someone else’s multiple streams of income). What it does have in common with all of the above is that it is desperately trying to get my attention. Finally, I’m starting to give it. But the distractions are tough, and the hope for a solution outside myself is compelling.
This year has been a good one for me because my focus on slowing down has me setting aside brochures/pamphlets/earlybird emails more often than I let myself in years past. I can recognize that what you offer may be the best thing since sliced bread, but right now I need to stick to fruits and vegetables. I still fall prey to it, but far less often and with far less stress or the now fairly ubiquitous FOMO. I’m fairly low-hanging fruit for Paul Selig, Scilla Elworthy, Thomas Hübl, Byron Katie and Machaelle Wright, but I have very little interest in adding anyone to that list (I think Claire Zammit would’ve been on it until her step two program turned out to be ten grand. i feel a little uninspired, but really think her Feminine Power course material is absolutely outstanding).
We all know what we need is within us. I truly think we all know that. And, I believe we are here to explore the world, to interact with it, experience it and taste it, so it seems natural to look outside of ourselves, too.
My goal this year is to experience the world from a place of wholeness, not a place of trying to fix. Don’t get me wrong, there is plenty of me that needs fixing, in all of the categories. But I don’t believe we’re here to fix ourselves. I believe we’re here to grow and experience and laugh and serve exactly as we are and into that which we can’t help but become.
This is my new cue. When i think “oh, that might <make me better>” I’m going to slow down. Breathe. Appreciate just how much peace of mind I have when I am breathing and slowing down, sitting and smiling.