Waking Up Indeed

That didn’t stick. But I’m back, and I’ll keep coming back, just like i keep quitting smoking. and hopefully eventually it’ll be consistent. Like mantra. Mantra is now consistent. When I experience distress of any kind I can feel myself looking for something, and as soon as I feel it, I’ve trained myself, “mantra!” and boy, is that soothing. Jesus suggested prayer without ceasing, and that, of course is the best way to go.

So, I am back. I haven’t looked back at what this blog holds, and it’s long enough ago that I don’t remember. But, I do remember 20 minutes, unedited, sharing my process.

My process has been busy. The Cope’s are in town, and that is exciting, but it seems I’ve been particularly busy since 2018 began. And, of course, as someone who is electing the advocacy of “slowing down” as a lifestyle, it is very interesting to at least try to bring that sensibility of slowness to the activities one must meet. As with all of life, it’s met with varying degrees of success and failure, but I can unequivocally say that slowing down is better than sliced bread. And here, a decade or so into this journey, I’ve gained the ability to really see the effort/payoff relationship. this turns everything on its head. while it is an effort to slow down – which is funny – the effort to stop efforting, the payoff is absolutely delicious! When you’re not fighting life, it unfolds. And that’s what it’s doing, unfolding.

Right now, with our friends in town, sadly the house has been full of sickies, and that’s just such a damned shame. But it is what it is, right? We play the hand we’re dealt, knowing this hand will end and another will be dealt and this ongoing process is the function of a universe that is moving ever-expansive into more freedom, love, creativity. And so we breathe.

I’m excited about geting back to this because it is SO IMPORTANT that I am talking, writing, thinking about slowing down. I had a lifetime of defaulting to action. And I don’t want illness to be teaching me – I want to be a good student and learn my lesson well and not need the ruler slap to keep me in line. but i’m not, i’m a crummy and forgetful student who has all sorts of tools and sometimes doesn’t implement them… But it’s been alive in my days (funny story about my dad, Toastmasters and the christmas party) and I want this process to be alive in my days, too. in service to my purpose.

My purpose: Evolving. Life breathing through my person. Being an instrument of love, care and WHOLENESS. My strategy: slow down, listen, be.

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